I have a knot inside me somewhere that keeps me tangled up to the point that it is extremely difficult to get any of my creative output out into the world. Even getting it created in the first place is hard. There's lots of stuff I cannot even manage to start, more that gets started but never finished and a little bit I can't even seem to let myself imagine.
Social media has been tremendously freeing as it has allowed me to get some work out there around, over and under my real constraints,sneaking or sprinting past the internal censors and simply ignoring all illusory barriers.I have even managed to untangle a little bit at the edges of the knot and create some slack for myself to be creative in ways that feed my spirit despite everything.
However,the knot remains and some of its central tangles may have even become tighter over time. I see evidence of this in how stirred up and even agitated I become when I try to work on anything even close to the core of my biggest vision. Pieces of it swirl to the surface and are gone so quickly that I most often can't decide on any particular angle to grab it from and start describing it in any coherent or reproducible form. I can come closest in conversation with a trusted friend or a stranger who might become a friend, but even my friends I fear are getting tired of hearing my ideas without legs to make them real.
(Thanks for listening to my internal processing. It really helps me.)